When someone you love has died the pain is overwhelming and you may experience lots of scary and difficult feelings that can be all mixed up and very confusing.
You may feel sad, angry, confused, scared, lonely, guilty, disbelief, pain and many other feelings. It is NORMAL to feel like this when someone we love has died.
You may feel it in your body too. Often people feel really tired and have no energy at all. You may find it really hard to eat and even sleep. Concentration may also be difficult and everyday things like going to school or out with friends can seem too hard.
There may seem little point in bothering with anything any more and you may wonder how life is going to be in the future. You miss your special person so much.
This is called grief and it is hard. It is good to share with someone how you feel. It may seem really difficult to talk to someone in your family but doing this can be very helpful. Often families do not want to talk about it just in case they upset each other but sharing your feelings can make life easier at home. You may prefer to find a friend or another adult you can talk to, someone you know you can trust and who will listen to you.
Talking may just be too difficult. Some children say that writing your feelings down can help. Some children write letters to their special person, others find keeping a diary or drawing pictures really helpful. It’s importantto try and express your feelings. Keeping all your worries and fears inside won’t make them go away.
Grief can last for a very long time but gradually the pain will get easier. You will always miss your special person,but eventually, over time, you will adjust to living in a different way.
It is important that you find ways of remembering your special person for the rest of your life. You can do this by:
- talking about them
- looking at photos
- keeping special belongings
- remembering special days.
It is important while you are grieving to have some normal routines and you should still allow yourself to have some fun. It doesn’t mean that you don’t care.
If you would like to talk more about your feelings please call us and we can arrange for you to have some support.